By Carol Dores
Do you see a half-filled cup as half empty or half full? Do you tend to focus on the negative or the positive?
We know that what we focus on expands and grows.
So in Positive Discipline, we try to focus on the positives and strengths. That does not mean that there are not challenging times. It does mean that we try to use tools and strategies to learn from the challenges.
What does this mean in terms of how we are with our children?
Instead of….Telling a child what they are doing wrong
Try…Telling them what they are doing right
Instead of…Telling a child what they are doing wrong
Try….Telling them what they are doing right
Instead of….Looking at mistakes as a problem
Try…Talking about what we can learn from them
Instead of…Talking about how hard a subject is
Try….Talking about how the child can use what they are good at to help them in challenging areas
Instead of….Dreading Mondays
Try…Talking about what is good about a new week starting
Instead of…Being critical of how a child made their bed
Try…Appreciating their effort in making the bed
Instead of…Thinking negative thoughts
Try…Thinking about what you are grateful for
For some of us who were raised by critical parents, this can be a huge shift in how we were raised. It may take a lot of thought and effort to look for the good rather than be critical. It is well worth the effort. You can also explain to your children that you are going to try to be more positive, and ask them to do the same. It can really help your home feel like a happier, more inviting place!